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Dating tips for fat

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Man, they really drill in the message early with this nonsense: Maybe that’s why dating as an adult so often feels like a class we’re flunking. With rare exception, dating is considered a pain in the ass, but a necessary hurdle if you want to advance to the next romantic level.And when you’re plus-sized (or if your appearance doesn’t conform to mainstream beauty standards in other ways), dating can seem fraught with even more challenges.

I’ve seen so many opening lines, especially on dating sites, along the lines of Here’s the thing. You probably think that it’ll make fat girls more likely to contact you first, but honestly it’s hurting your cause more than anything. *(Note, saying things like ‘real women have curves’, ‘only dogs like bones’, ‘skinny girls are gross’ are horrible things to say. We’re real people with real personalities and feelings. Again, can’t speak for all fat girls, but lots of us have had a lot of bad experiences when it comes to dating.

Well, two male co-workers were talking about online dating and mentioned that they’d never contact a girl that was in that class or “curvy”, because any time they’d met one in the past, she’d been much heavier than in her pictures.

I’m wondering if this is why guys will view me a lot, but won’t make contact.

The internet is full of stories about women being horrifically fat-shamed or harassed on dating sites, and yes, those stories need to be told. And at a certain point, I think they can become inadvertent scare tactics, frightening plus-sized women out of the dating pool.

So, I reached out to Marie Southard Ospina, journalist, style blogger, and beloved bad-ass of the body positive movement.